I am probably one of the more judgmental people on this planet. I admit it. I always have been critical of behavior, choices, circumstances of others… and while I secretly and internally judged, I usually brushed off that judgment with, “they can do whatever they want, but I certainly would never do that.”
In fact, I am scientifically proven to be judgmental. I took the Myers-Briggs personality test twice- and received the same outcome twice: ESFJ. Extroverted, Sensory, Feeling, JUDGING. So there. It’s in me.
I’m not exactly proud of it, and 99.9 per cent of the time, my first impression judgment on someone is wrong. My close friends all have the same joke with me: “you hated me when you first met me.” Yep, I pretty much did, and/or thought you were dumb, and now we’re bffs. Lol.
I know. Awful, and so un-yogi like. But it’s built in me. And I recognize it. So when the voice is yapping away while someone is telling/doing something I “don’t approve of” I tell it to just simmer down. Unless I’ve had a couple cocktails, then I really can’t promise anything.
As life would have it- an intriguing thing has happened as of late. I’m the one making some interesting choices… and my girlfriends? So far- have been AWESOME about them. Like amazing. Like they think my life is enthralling/funny/adventurous/entertaining. There’s no judging- I mean, maybe they are on the inside- but I would never know. And for them… the thing that matters most is that I am happy. Enjoying life. They support me through my crazy times. And that is when you know you have a good friend.
So here’s what. I want to do the same for my friends and others- I want to just be accepting of anything presented to me and not go into instant-criticism mode. Bite my tongue a bit. Assess a little while longer. Trust them in their own decision, unless they are asking advice of me. Truly be there for friends who tell me about a situation they are in… I want them to feel the same loving acceptance and cheer that my darling dolls extended to me.
Thanks, fishes, love you. xoxo