Fear and Loathing in …. the Grocery Store

Dammit. Where is the paprika?! http://www.listal.com

One would think, as a highly discriminating foodie, grocery shopping would be among my weekly, if not daily, highlights.

One would think.

But alas, I am a lazy foodie. One of those snobbish persnickety critics who can easily dispense remarks, but yet is ironically unable to produce anything nearly as creative and flavorful as what I taste. Primarily because I am single and I am of the opinion that exerted effort for one person’s meal is the same effort for a four-person meal.

And why put out all that effort for just lil ol me?


Again, one would think that although I am cooking for one, why not economize, cook for four, and freeze/save the remainder for the next couple of days?

Heh heh. Must I revisit… highly…. discriminating… foodie? Frozen, reheated … I can only do one time. Anything after that and my tired palate turns up her fussy nose.

So you see, I am in a predicament… I demand amazing food, yet I don’t want to cook it – for myself?

As a result of my abhorrence for all things inefficient, I shop at the store (only Whole Foods, and if I am in an agreeable mood- and don’t mind the three-ring circus that is the Trader Joe’s parking lot- then Trader Joe’s), walk out with my three or four totebags, and will consume every last crumb before I dare step back into that store again.

Lindsay shops there too. http://www.fanpop.com

I recently had a visit from Katie Bressack, owner of Balanced Beings, and Board Certified Holistic Health Coach. Katie does a great job of analyzing your nutritional needs and recommending a plan. She and I discussed how and why- the psychology, if you will- behind my solo cooking aversion. We determined that I felt it was too much effort… even though we both knew that I needed to eat more at home- not only for my wallet’s sake, but for my health (one can only eat out so much… or can they? I believe that question is still up for debate).

I’m thinking about this right now as I procrastinate going to Whole Foods, stomach grumbling, knowing I need to get something to eat. Then my brain goes into calculation mode… drive to the store. Park the car. Get the cart. Figure out what I will eat for this week/2weeks/month/until I can get back here… get back in the car, drive back, unload, prep, cook and…. ah, eat. All of that. Makes me want to open that can of pumpkin from last Thanksgiving I have stored in my cupboard and fashion some sort of pumpkin soup out of any other remnants I may have handy.

Probably a pretty damn good pumpkin soup. http://www.myrecipes.com

But no, I must force myself to get up and go. I know I make it sound like such an abominable chore to cook, but that isn’t entirely true.  I actually have culinary proclivities, and enjoy cooking for myself and others. I love coming up with the main course for Book Club, I adore cooking with a love interest, or with friends bbq-ing it up. I think it’s the single thing. That it’s just cooking for me. Or, perhaps there is a deeper meaning… that I don’t feel like … I deserve a good meal?

Naw, I’m just too damn lazy. I know I deserve a good meal. The best meal, even- I just like it prepared for me by a professional! And I don’t get Farm Fresh to You delivered often enough.

Also, I’m not a fan of the store. The idea of aisles and aisles of packaged products actually frightens me. Not panic-attack-inducing-OCD-frightening. Just bizarre. It’s kind of Trumanshow-esque. Rows of markety glossy-coated boxes and bags and things. Get me in and get me out. It’s like an episode of Supermarket Sweep.


Hmmm…..  I really should just go to Farmer’s Markets instead. There is one today, Friday! How did I not remember this?! Have I just solved my own fear of the store? Am I cured!!!??? Not only is there a market, but I can ride my bicycle there. Exercise and local produce/items. Can’t beat that.

Happy Farmer’s Market http://www.msnbc.msn.com

Single peeps out there… do you just eat out all the time or do you spend 30-60 minutes a night cooking for yourself? I prefer to use actual ingredients versus packaged goods. Would love to hear some new ideas for busy single people like me!


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