The Men Tell Some

It’s that time of the year… the summer version of The Men Tell All.

*Side note* I love that lately I am finding out I have more guy friends than ever watching this show. The viewer demographics on this show are outta control.

I also love that Chris Harrison still uses the phrase, “the most dramatic __________ EVER!”

Recap Thoughts on Chris/Emily sit down:

Not much to say here other than they recapped what we already know: Ryan is a smug muther f’er and Kalon is an insecure baby boy. The awkward Doug kiss breakup situation just re-embarrassed and caused serious side coughs in America all over again. Joe – lame. Travis- lame. Arie’s brothers spying- kinda funny. Cray Cray Chris is still Cray Cray. Dudes who can’t dance are low on my list now that I’ve seen Channing Tatum in Magic Mike.

Regarding the Bachelor Pad Plug:

Of course – it’s dramatic. Ooh, Cray Cray Chris and a knife? And ew, he’s SO gross.  I can’t believe Ed is on this show. ! OMG I love that Reid and Ed are archnemeses- that is so awesome.

Recap Thoughts on Beginning Segment:
– H O L Y SHIZ. Ryan did some SERIOUS spray tanning. Or real tanning. Or someone just sponge painted Burnt Sienna all over the dude.
– Aw, Sean is so cute.
– I love Arie’s interpretation of  Daddy Doug, Hulk-style.
– These little snippets of Jef make me miss him.
– I love that John called out Cray Cray on his insecurity.
– Kalon is great friends with Chris and Tony because they are all on Bach Pad.
– Wolfman in pink pants? I still don’t get this dude.

Recap Thoughts on Kalon in the Hot Seat:
– Again, aw, Sean is so cute.
– Kalon is just not attractive and completely oblivious.
– Did I mention Sean is cute? He is great.
– I can’t believe Lindzi and Kalon???!! On Bach Pad? Wtf?

Recap Thoughts on Ryan in the Hot Seat:
– Arie is cracking me up on him
– Weird white tank top? Did anyone notice that?
– Bachelor Ryan – ew, glad that’s not happening.
– He is Gaston from Beauty and the Beast- Oui?
– Ryan’s goodbye speech is cracking me up.
– Dear God. Sean is hot.
– I do love that he keeps calling out Cray Cray on his insecurity.

Recap Thoughts on Ol’ Cray Cray in the Hot Seat:
– Cray Cray Chris looks like he wants to kill someone in the little picture window
– At least Cray is saying that it hurt- that is good for him to be upfront.
– Glad Chris H called out Cray on his anger management issues. Can you imagine if you messed up on his dinner?
– He’s WAY too serious. Ugh. Red Flags. Red Flags.
– Yes, he’s gonna hook it up on Bach Pad- that’s why he don’t care no mo.

Recap Thoughts on Hot Sean in the Hot Seat:
– Did I mention this kid is hot? He’s gonna make some little hottie 24 year old super happy one day.
– Sean is so genuine and great and I hope he is the next Bachelor.
– He had never had a broken heart? I think everyone (although it sucks) should have one at least once. It will change you- in all the right ways. Good for your character. Good for your soul.

Recap Thoughts on Emily in the Hot Seat:
– Did Em get another nose job? It’s looking a little more petite than usual.
– “What girl wouldn’t want Sean?” Well, you, Emily.
– Cray Cray just stop talking please.
– Dorky Doug you also need to stop talking.
– I think everyone likes seeing Em take down Kalon?
– Ryan is SO orange and brown it is ridiculous.

Arie– I’m not actually a fan, but the montage kinda made me like him more.
Jef– well, you already know I adore this kid. Except for saying “like” too often. I’ve decided that she can marry Jef and I can just take his hair and put it in my pocket and marry  the sh^& out of it myself.

THREE HOUR FINALE next Sunday!