I’ve written posts about love. I’ve written posts about the show Hoarders. I have not yet written about the two combined.
No, no. I do not have a crazy love for Hoarders… but I did watch the show.
I decided to hibernate last weekend (since I was in Argentina the weekend before, I will be in the OC this weekend and the next two weekends I will be in Italy! More on that later… ). When I hibernate, I partake in all my guilty pleasures at once. Almond Milk Ice Cream (chocolate), pjs and slippers, my dogs on the couch, and shows like Hoarders, Say Yes to the Dress, or I’ll watch a few eps of Sex and the City (dang that show is becoming dated!). That is my hibernation behavior.
After watching an episode of Say Yes to the Dress (where people were on their second and third weddings…I mean, I can’t even get my first and these chicks were on their third!?), I switched over to Hoarders.
As I was watching, the main theme that I could see cropping up over and over again (I watched like three episodes with two hoarders apiece)… was that these people had to let go of their stuff in order to literally let their loved ones in. They had pushed out all the right people because they were living with all their junk. Their still-tagged, newly bought and/or thirty-year-old can of beans, rat feces and cat skeletons stuff. People were living with this over their own husbands.
Now, my house is not like this… but what I realized, is, that it wasn’t my house I where I was a Hoarder, it was and is, my heart. I have a bunch of sh*$ty stuff still in there. I’ve hung onto that can of beans for ten years that I really truly need to let go. I’m hanging onto new things with tags on them that I’ll never wear, that I’ll never use because they don’t fit me… even though it just seemed like a good deal at the time.
Ok, so, yeah, I’m not referring to actual “stuff”. I am referring to people. People who did crappy things that I need to just let go and forget, clean out and make room for. People who I brought in because they were shiny and new and great, but not a good fit for me.
I am a hoarder… I’m just a different kind of hoarder. My cat skeletons are in a different form. I know I need to clean out my “house” to allow my loved ones in. To allow new loves in. I’ve tried over the years to do this, and apparently instead of cleaning, I’ve accumulated more. I’m ready to just clean it all out. Start over new. There’s no need to hold onto anything anymore, if I want to fill that space instead with love. Time to just let go of the cat skull. Let it go.