Aussie ABCs

You’ve probably figured by now that I am going to post about Australia all week- and that would be correct. I’m going to start off easy. Some of the initial observations I had while I was in Australia. Then as the week progresses, I’ll get into the internal, meaningful stuff.

Welcome to Bondi Beach, Dec 2012
Welcome to Bondi Beach, Dec 2012

I’m going to be brutally honest, because that is the way I am (if you don’t already know).
I’ll try to be tactful… but I hope you Aussies don’t take offense if anything seems bitchy! 😉


1. They LOVE alcohol.

Example 1: I spilled about 3 tablespoons of wine on myself on the Qantas flight over. The guy brought me a napkin, and another bottle of wine.
Example 2: There are ‘drink driver’ stations set up at 930am. Yes, I said AM.
Example 3: Not only do Aussies party on New Year’s Eve, they get up and do it again New Year’s Day. ALL DAY. Like New Year’s Day is actually the bigger event.
Example 4: There was not a single day that went by that I didn’t drink something. Even if it was only one drink.

2. They say, “How you going?”

This threw me off, as the first few times I would think someone was asking me “where you going?” And I had to think for a minute, and while I wanted to say “the store,” I bit my tongue and said, “good. how are you?”

3. Favorite vocab words: Heaps, Ages, Spoke, Chillax, Reckon, Pleasure or No Worries

Use it in a sentence:
“There were heaps and heaps of them there.”
“I haven’t seen him for ages!!!” Or “That was ages ago!”
“I spoke with Tom.” or “Did you speak with Tom?” The word talk does not exist.
“I’m just chillaxing today.”
“I reckon it’s 32 outside.”
Thanks for the ride, James, response:  “Pleasure” or “No worries

4. They walk super fast.

Just be prepared- is all I’m sayin’.

5. The accent goes away.

That sexy Hugh Jackman accent sounds like normal after a couple of days.

6. They love their cliques and inside stories.

Aussies are super duper surface-level friendly for about 5 minutes with strangers, but then they prefer to talk about people, places, parties, events and things amongst themselves that have nothing to do with you. Try and keep up!

7. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Hot or Not?

This cat usually gets picked up on everywhere I go (I know that sounds egotistical, but I’m just stating fact). One Aussie picked up on me and it was in Melbourne. Although, conversely, I found no one attractive enough to hit on myself- so I suppose we have a mutual ‘affection’ for each other… lol.

8. US Dollar is Lame

You think New York is expensive? Try Australia. The US dollar sucks bones now so you’ll have to make do with $16 cocktails. What’s nice is there is no/minimal tipping (minimum wage is $25 so all the workers are really good and friendly) and there’s no such thing as .99. There are no pennies. Whatever the price is…. $12.20, $14.50 is what you pay.

9. Texting is SO overrated.

Real Aussies call each other. Yes, they use their cell phones to talk. Hardly anyone texts. I think they like hearing each other’s accents.

10. “Darling” is the norm.

“Sweetie” and “honey” are the US equivalents, usually reserved for a blue-haired eighty year old to say to anyone younger than them. Darling is reserved for anyone and everyone.

11. Public toilets are clean as a whistle.

Seriously, I was amazed. There is never a seat cover needed and the seats are sit-worthy, 100 percent of the time. Even in the loudest craziest clubs. I mean, I think they’ve never heard of or seen “The Fraternity Squat,” I’m pretty damn sure. Sit with no worries, mate!

12. Cute and Soft

Koala Bear: Bree, 7 months old. Hunter Valley Zoo, 2012.
Koala Bear: Bree, 7 months old. Hunter Valley Zoo, 2012.

The beaches are smaller and the sand so much softer, the water clearer (but equally as chilly!) as it is here in SoCal. Person per square feet is a bit more snug, but there’s less real estate to deal with. Other cute and softs? All the cuddly animals are to die for.

13. It’s really similar to US

I was shocked at the familiarity of Australia- at least in its cities. It was like Seattle, San Fran and LA smushed in one. Seriously. Canada is more weird to me. But you still have the usual “people drive on the left side, km, meters.” Queen’s stuff.

14. Food is pretty damn good.

Calamari Salad YUM
Calamari Salad and Sangria YUM

The portions are just right, and actually surprisingly tasty… I enjoyed pretty much everything I ate in Australia.

15. Wear synthetic clothes out, bring leather to the beach.

Really odd… the ladies everywhere were wearing what appeared to be tight polyester? Like cheapy fabrics. I was kind of surprised actually. Because their leather handbags were gorgeous… in fact I saw a ton of to-die-for supple leather handbags everywhere… even at/on the beach!

These were just my superficial observations of Australia. I actually thought a lot of positives of the country- everyone was very friendly and helpful, knowledgable, kind. There were some gorgeous ladies, and fun beautiful locations. Delicious amazing food.  Agree? Disagree? I’ll be back with more of my adventures, thoughts and experiences….


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